Let’s talk about dance floor expectations.
“It’s half past nine and my guests aren’t filling the dance floor like I had wanted! Is it just not that kind of party? Why isn’t everyone having the time of their lives! All the videos I’ve seen on Instagram and TikTok show packed out rooms with hands in the air, why isn’t mine like that?!”
-Couples at their reception parties, everywhere.
Social media videos might appear to have promised you a manic party scene of people dancing on the tables and throwing mad shapes hard all night, so what do you do when the dance floor has been open for a while, but it’s still all a bit empty?
Ok, let’s be realistic. The dance floor is going to be open for typically 4-6 hours, and it’s not going to be crammed for every last minute. Just because it’s half past nine and people aren’t on it, doesn’t mean it’s time to panic. Those social media videos you’ve seen are snippets of peak dancing, usually taken after 11pm, when everyone is fully lubricated and the big anthems are being smashed out. But even so, you might well be disappointed that there isn’t a bit more of a buzz going on when you likely had big expectations for a full blown party in progress by this time.
There’s a few things that need to be considered before you resign yourself to a low-key party you might not have wanted:
Firstly, although the dance floor might not be popping off, your guests might be having a wonderful time anyway! Music doesn’t have to be danced to to be enjoyed. Often a great selection of tunes can simply be the soundtrack to everyone having fun chatting, drinking or exploring and enjoying the rest of the venue. Perhaps it’s a glorious evening and everyone is enjoying the garden or sunset. This is particularly true in the summer months while it can stay light until 10pm. No matter how good your band or DJ is, it’s hard for them to compete with a stunning sunset in a beautiful setting, especially when your guests have spent so much time sat down indoors at the wedding breakfast not long before. Have no doubt, once it starts getting dark, your guests will come inside and likely hit the dance floor hard.
It is also worth reminding yourself that the dancing will naturally ebb and flow through the evening, and that is completely normal. Natural breaks in dancing can occur for lots of reasons, including older guests getting tired and calling it a night (this is very typical after the first hour when the Motown, disco and 80’s pop has been replaced by newer music less familiar to older guests). Also, food is likely served around 8:30-9pm, when your hungry guests will flock to the buffet to stock up on something delicious. This can often lead to around 40 minutes of a quieter dance floor before people filter back in fed and ready for round two. Certain guests saying good bye can also pull people away too, as can scheduled activities such as fireworks or sparklers.
Another significant factor is where your bar might be located in relation to your dance floor. The bar is a natural point of congregation at wedding receptions, and your guests will very likely get caught up there chatting away, with a drink in their hand, for hours on end, particularly if they can’t hear or see the dance floor. It’s a bit of a DJ nightmare to arrive at a venue to discover that the bar is in a completely different part to the dancing. The DJ has to stay behind the decks choosing the music, and being unsighted by the guests means they don’t have that opportunity to read the room and see what is making your guests tap their feet and inspire them into dancing. There is, however, a tried and tested remedy for this situation, and that is that you, the newly married couple, pull people out of their conversations, and drag them to the disco for a dance. You guys will never be left hanging by yourselves on the dance floor by your friends and family, so persuade them otherwise follow you and join you on the dance floor. Perhaps have a certified banger that you know will get your friends moving up your sleeve, a special request to tell your DJ when you come in. I’ve seen it a thousand times. You are your own most powerful resource to instigate the party.
The day of the week the party is held on can have a significant effect on how people behave and enjoy themselves. Week day weddings can be enormous fun and don’t necessarily mean the dancing can’t keep going til the end, but definitely be aware that mid-week weddings will mean that many guests might have work the next day and simply can’t cut loose like they might on a weekend.
In any event, the amount of time your guests spend dancing is not, and will never be, the ultimate measure of whether your reception was a success, or even if your guests had fun or not. Having a full dance floor at the end of the night is a special thing, but it is far from the most special thing about the day. Celebrating comes in many happy forms, from catching up with seldom seen family, making new friends or strengthening ties with old ones. The memories of the day will be many and last far longer than the last tune of the night.
